Driscoll gives science report a beat down

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Skippy R

According to Marc Driscoll, controversial pastor of Mars Hill Church in Seattle, a new report from the American Academy of Pediatricians that says children and teens shouldn’t box is part of a conspiracy that continues to portray Jesus as a “neutered and Marc Driscolllimp-wristed Sky Fairy.”  The report recommended young people “participate in sports where the prime focus is not deliberate blows to the head.” Driscoll says that’s nonsense. “Boxing is an essential element of being a Christian man, and it’s one of the foundations on which America was built.” The abrasive 40-year-old megachurch alpha male is a fan of mixed martial arts, and says his favorite movie is Fight Club. Any male believer –young or old– who doesn’t suffer a couple of concussions a year just isn’t living out his faith, Driscoll insists. “I’ve learned that if you turn the other cheek fast enough, it can literally knock an opponent to the ground,” he said, as he slammed an empty Red Bull can against his forehead, flattening it with one blow.

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Rick Perry Devotional: A confession

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Skippy R

Editor’s Note: Gov. Perry is our guest devotional writer.
First, let me confess that I did make an unfair remark about Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke.

Prayer Time With Perry

I said any more emergency efforts by Ben Bernanke to resuscitate the economy would be “almost treasonous.”  What I meant was that without trusting in Jesus to solve our problems, we might as well chuck it all anyway. Sure, I understand that Bernanke is trying to do his best. That’s one of the many things I appreciate about the Jewish people. I just wish we’d all wait for the capitalist process to kick in.  I promise you, if we watch that rotting mass of decaying, failed economy long enough, it will pull itself up by its bootstraps. Sort of like the God-blessed process of spontaneous generation. Think about it.

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Ugly Band of the Week: Pillar

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Skippy R

Our Ugly Christian Band of the Week feature reviews the most important aspect of any Gospel/Christian music group—its fashion sense.

Pillar

The Tulsa-based Christian rock band Pillar won three Dove “Hard Music Album of the Year” awards in a row. One of their most popular songs is “Fireproof,” based on Daniel chapter 3:

“Try to torch me and you’ll find, You can’t turn me or deter me, No matter how you try, You can’t burn me.”

Indeed! Judging from the photo, Pillar has been through hell and back. It’s a wonder they’re alive. At the very least, there was a serious accident with a curling iron, and no amount of mousse will disguise the fact. I suppose the photo shoot was already scheduled and, being a Christian band, they didn’t want to postpone and disappoint the photographer.

There is a widespread opinion, rampant among those in the Christian music business, that faith and fashion don’t mix. Unless this heresy is rooted out, bands like Pillar will continue to foist publicity photos like this on their fan base. And God help them when the backlash begins.

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Correction: Pat out-Pats himself

Posted on August 29, 2011 by Skippy R

We should know by now not to anticipate ANYTHING Pat Robertson might do. I guess we’ll never learn.
Pat RobertsonOn April 24 we humorously suggested that the televangelist had charged that the East Coast earthquake was the result of “quantitative easing” by the Fed.  Sure enough, the same day we posted that, Robertson said on The 700 Club that the natural disaster “means that we’re closer to the coming of the Lord.” He preceded his statement with an unprecedented disclaimer : “I don’t want to get weird on this, so please take it for what it’s worth.”  Now, that’s a REAL sign of the End Times.

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Rick Perry Devotional: Our Founding Fathers

Posted on August 28, 2011 by Skippy R

Editor’s Note: Gov. Perry is our guest devotional writer.
This weekend I was kickin’ back in the Hill Country with my Christian bros Rick Scarborough, Judge Paul Pressler and historian David Barton. Of course the conversation turned to our country’s Founding Fathers and their matchless faith.

Prayer Time With Perry

Prayer Time With Perry

I asked Barton if I could have fit in with that revolutionary crowd. Would I have had the chutzpah, the cajones, to stand for God like they did? He asked for a 13-minute recess, consulted his primary sources, and then told me, Sure. I could have passed for at least New Hampshire’s William Whipple, anyway, if not Thomas Jefferson. Then I got real focused, sort of intense, squeenched up my forehead and leaned forward, knocking his glass of sweet iced tea onto the porch. Why not Jefferson? I asked. He hemmed and hawed, glanced at his watch and pleaded a pressing engagement in Waco. Since then I’ve sort of scratched Dave off my list. I’m concentrating more on the Gilded Age now.

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