Blind Folly

President Obama’s trip to Australia caused an uproar among religious fundamentalists when he visited the town of Darwin. “The president’s presence there gives an official stamp of government approval to Charles Darwin and the teaching of his theory of evolution in public schools,” said James Bryce, director of the Creation Science and Natural Theology Commission in Cleveland, Ohio.  “On the other hand, we would also have a problem should the President visit Alice Springs. The use of a female place name suggests that a woman’s place isn’t in the home, but somewhere in the middle of the Outback.”
Instead, Bryce said, the President should visit Melbourne.
“It’s named after the Victorian-era prime minister of England and a fine fellow.  The first part of the city’s name is ‘Mel,’ with intimations of Mel Gibson, Australian director of Passion of the Christ. The second part is ‘Bourne,’ reflective of Jason Bourne, whose mistrust of the CIA and big government interference in people’s personal lives has been portrayed in novels and film.
“Finally, we would only suggest the President take care to avoid the flight path of Oceanic Flight 815 on his return to the USA.”

In a small Texas community north of Waco, Occupy Elm Mott takes up its position at the epicenter of power and privilege in the town– the curb outside the Dollar General store.

Sid Mahoney, proprietor of the Dollar General and interim mayor, approaches the protest.

“Bob, what do you think you’re doin’?”

“It’s a revolution! We’re occupying your capitalist reactionary storefront, Mr. Mahoney. It’s a symbol of the Wall Street barons and fat cats who are smothering direct democracy and stealing power from the people.” Protester Bob Graham, a part-time student at McClennan County Community College, is active in the theater program there.

Mr. Mahoney stopped and cocked his head. “Now what makes you say that, Bob?”

“Look at your store sign,” Bob said. “It’s got the almighty ‘Dollar’ right there for all to see. Plus the fact that your taxes support the fossil fuel interests that poison our air and water. And, you’re probably putting your profits in a bank, which supports the morally bankrupt financial system. Corporations are not people! Human Need, Not Greed!”

“Bob, you know I don’t make a profit. I break even, and my wife has to work as the greeter at the Antiquibles Mall and Dog Museum for us to get by.”

“No, Mr. Mahoney. We are the roused rabble. We are the 99%. You are the 1%. ”

“Bob, there’s only one of ya out here. And there are about 200 people in this town total. We are the 99 per cent and you are somethin’ less than one percent. Break’s over. Now get back to work.”

Reluctantly Bob picked up his broom and started sweeping the sidewalk where he left off. Occupy Elm Mott would have to wait.