Temps Rise, Fear of Hell Plummets

Posted on August 23, 2011 by Skippy R

With 100-plus temperatures baking the nation for most of the summer, many evangelical and fundamentalist churches have seen a drop in attendance.

Heat Wave“When you can fry an egg on the sidewalk, preaching about an eternity in hell seems beside the point,” lamented Ed Stephens, pastor of Bethel Bible Temple in Tulsa.

In response, many churches are switching their emphasis from fear of damnation to touting the pleasures of a refreshingly cool and crisp — even minty-fresh –Heaven.

John Hagee’s church conducted a “Fourth of July Chill-Down with Jesus” featuring elaborate sets from the original Superman movie’s arctic Fortress of Solitude and then knocking the A/C down to a shivering 40 degrees.

“The angels are waiting for you up there,” Hagee thundered from the pulpit last Sunday. “They’re waiting with earmuffs and igloos for you repentant sinners!”  More than 100 people walked the aisle for counseling and a complimentary cup of hot chocolate.

About Skippy R

Skippy R is retired after toiling as a scribe for a large denominational newspaper in Texas for about 40 years. He's written for The Wittenburg Door and Beliefnet. He lives in Dallas with his wife, Mrs. Skippy, and leads a Bible study in his home. Mostly spends time running after his grandkids. He is -- what are they calling it now? -- a Jesus follower.
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