Home & Family Values Corner: Gesundheit!

A teacher in Vacaville, Calif., is penalizing his students if they say “God bless you” after someone sneezes. It’s disruptive, he says, and besides, “in the old days they were saying, ‘God bless you’ for getting rid of evil spirits. But today, I said what you’re doing doesn’t really make any sense anymore.” Well, let’s be honest. Science is still not certain what causes that explosive and disconcerting expulsion of air. Evil spirits have not been completely ruled out. But we do know one thing– the atheists are on a campaign to replace “God bless you” with godless alternatives. Frankly, the focus shouldn’t be on how people respond to a sneeze, but on stopping those horrible and dangerous outbursts in the first place. When one of my children sneezes, I simply respond with the blunt but insightful phrase, “you’re gonna die.” This snaps him back to crystal clarity to face his ultimate mortality. It may also deter him from sneezing again. At the very least, he will stay out of my way for a while.
Next week: Why wiping your nose with your right hand could cause your arm to wither.