Evangelical conservative elites gathering in Brenham, Texas, this weekend to find an alternative to Mormon candidate Mitt Romney finally agreed on their choice two minutes after the conclusion of the Denver Broncos’ overtime win against the Pittsburgh Steelers.
“It’s Tim Tebow, definitely,” said Judge Paul Pressler, best known for crafting the fundamentalist takeover of the Southern Baptist Convention.
“When we watched him take a knee after the overtime victory, many of us were weeping, openly and unashamedly,” Pressler confessed.
A teary-eyed James Dobson interrupted: “His 316 yards passing aligned so perfectly with the John 3:16 scripture marked into his eye black that the voice of God was obvious. And that’s not counting the fact that he stopped the liberal, jobs-killing playoff bid by the Steelers.”
But will Tebow be willing to give up his $9.7 million contract with the Broncos to enter the Republican Primary race ? If not, the group said they would fall back to their No. 2 pick, politically conservative actor Gary Busey.
See all the old archived, classic Rick Perry Devotionals here!